Every now and then I have a client who doesn't show up for a scheduled session and I don't hear from the client again even after I check in. What I do "hear" though is a no. It may not be an openly communicated no, but it's a no nevertheless. A choice was made, and [...]
Last month I ended my job in community mental health after five years of service, so I've been thinking a lot about transitions. Transitions can be exciting (getting married, welcoming a child into the family, starting your own business), but even the most exciting (and "self"-promoted) transitions can be daunting. Transitions bring us into direct [...]
Do you feel you can never do anything right? Do you often compare yourself to others, and come out as the loser? Many people (you?) wrestle with deep seated feelings of inadequacy. Frequently, this feeling has a long history and goes back to growing up with a critical mother or father. Maybe their parents openly [...]
Teenagers are not the only rebels. Many of us 18 and older are rebels still. We are rebels with a cause. We continue to fight our aging parents and try to make room for who we want to become. We are, it seems, stuck in a state of arrested development. Maybe you didn't get to [...]
I must have been eleven or twelve when I saw this film. What I remember most vividly about it were the main characters: grown men and women actors with the voices of young children. And not only that, they also behaved like children: they bickered, grabbed, pulled hair, pouted and threw tantrums when something wasn't [...]
If you have ever wondered why my counseling practice is called "For You Are Made of Stars", here is why. Nine years ago my family and I visited beautiful Nelson, British Columbia. Exploring downtown, we stumbled across a small French bakery, tucked away on a small back lane. We stepped inside, and while my kids [...]
As I am utilizing quite a bit of EMDR in my work with clients, here is a brief introduction to this unique healing approach. Initially developed for the treatment of trauma, EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) has shown high efficacy in the resolution of many mental health problems, sometimes in only one or two [...]
Did you know that bamboo grown for timber takes three years to germinate and sprout? Three years the bamboo farmer needs to water the seed, every day. For a thousand days, the farmer needs to show up and water the ground, not knowing when a green sprout breaks through the ground or if it [...]
Man's best friend has received much praise, and here is more to come, prompted by witnessing our dog's reaction to a recent traumatic injury. Our dog, avid ball catcher and squirrel chaser, managed to jam a two inch piece of wood between two of her front paw toes. Nothing was noticed at the time of [...]
Entering therapy is often a big deal. It can take a lot of time, money, and mental space, so of course you want it to work. But how does it actually work? What makes therapy effective? In this post, I am not going to talk about evidence-based practices and treatment approaches (e.g. EMDR, CBT etc) [...]